I am a "technoramus"!

I know, I know, Mr. Webster is probably rolling over in his grave right now, but I had to concoct a new word to describe my pitiful state of being right now. Who knows, this could actually be added to the old guys big book of words along with "ginourmous". Here is the definition according to Tammy: A technoramus is an aging missionary lady who sits at her computer often with complete ignorance as to how to do anything except turn it on, yet she ventures in with fear and trembling and often turns it off in despair". (Wow, I am out of breath after that crazy run-on sentence) Yes, I am the epitome of a "technoramus". (sigh)
Come along and experience with me a day in the life of a "technoramus":

First I gather on my work surface (usually my bed since it is the only half way cool room in the house) three different computers. On one computer are the majority of my pictures that I need to do my powerpoint backgrounds for Sunday worship. This computer is a mini Dell and I love it but 1) it absolutely refuses to hook up to the printer 2) it has a lovely red line down the right side of the screen due to some random hardware issue 3) It does not have Microsoft Powerpoint on it because my free trial ran out on it and I can't pay $100+ to purchase it. The second computer is a full size Acer computer that one of our churches gifted us with after our Dell was stolen when we were robbed last March. It has lots of my powerpoint background pics on it but 1) It is slower than the seven year itch 2) It no longer has a port to hook to the printer or flash drive because the stupid thing fell out a couple of months ago 3) I now fight with it every Sunday because it shoots me messages about "getting low on memory" (but remember I can't copy anything off of it because it doesn't have a port for a flash drive) 4) It is the ONLY one of the computers that has the Microsoft Powerpoint program on it. Then there is the third computer on the bed with me. It is a mini Acer Aspire just recently given to us by another one of our supporting churches but 1) The cursor skips all over the place while I try to type on it 2) Our printer only communicates with it on days when we don't really need it to and rarely on Sundays 3) It does not have most of my powerpoint pics on it 4) It does NOT have the Microsoft Powerpoint program on it. So.....here is how it goes for Tammy the "technoramus" every week: I find the pics I need on said mini Dell and e-mail them to myself. Then I move to the port-less big Acer, pull up my e-mail account and copy the pics to my picture folder or desktop. I create the powerpoints for Sunday worship on this one because it has the powerpoint program on it. Then I highlight and copy the words to all the songs I just made powerpoints for, go to my e-mail account again, and paste the words in a document to send to myself. Then I go to the mini Acer, pull up my e-mail account, highlight and copy the words to the songs onto a Wordpad document and then print them off...that is if the printer chooses to recognize the computer on that day. (Yes, after this I am tired) So, what would take a technogeek about ten minutes to do, takes this "technoramus" several hours to do. Get the picture?
What is the cure? I kinda think my sons would tell you there is NO cure for this particular "technoramus" cuz perhaps you just can't teach an old dog new tricks. There may be no cure for any of us who come from the "snail mail" generation for that matter. Maybe we just need to start all over again with one computer that has everything we need on it....except of course the one big feature it won't have. A genius to work it. :)
This has been another rambling of one tired Jamerican....SELAH!