My new blog site

I have moved! After much frustration with my blogger account I have decided to set up a new blog with wordpress. From now on please go to www.2tiredjamericans. wordpress.com to keep up with us in Jamaica. I am trying to become a true blogger by actually keeping this up to date. Our goal is to keep you informed of what is going on in our ministry in Jamaica and to sometimes make you chuckle. Thanks for following us and most of all thanks for your prayers.

This has been the last rambling of this tired Jamerican on this blog site....SELAH!

Looking up.....

I'm not sure if I've ever told you, but I am the worship leader at our sweet little church here in Montego Bay. Funny thing is, I never really pictured myself doing this. Actually, I pictured myself singing alto in a Southern gospel group. >sigh> (I fear neither my voice or hair is big enough for that) Truth is, when you plant a church it's all hands on deck. I suspect I am not the only one who has stepped out of her comfort zone and into God's assignment.
Tonight we worked on two new songs: Everlasting God, and I Exalt Thee. It was new to everyone in my little worship team, except me. I had to sit as we rehearsed because the pain in my left leg and foot was so severe. But, I was so excited about these two songs. As we attempted to blend our voices it happened. The Holy Spirit just gripped my tattered heart and squeezed it so hard that the tears poured out. Just me, this broken vessel, has the privilege to exalt my heavenly Savior, the creator of the universe. The scripture is found in Psalm 97:9...."For thou O Lord art high above all the earth. Thou art exalted far above all gods."
Father, I exalt Thee, I exalt Thee, I exalt Thee, O Lord.
Sometimes it just takes being flat on your back so you can look up....LOOK UP....and exalt the Everlasting God. He will not faint and He won't grow weary.
This is just the rambling of one very tired...but oh so blessed Jamerican....SELAH!

My Precious Blessings from Ethiopia

The day we have all been waiting for has finally come and gone. Last night we welcomed our sweet new grandsons home from Ethiopia. My daughter Stefie, granddaughter Macey, and son Seth joined lots of family and friends at Orlando International Airport to welcome them to their new world. I can't even imagine what was running through their minds as they walked around the corner to the screams of delight by a quite large crowd. The world as they know it has forever changed. Welcome to our family Christian Abiti and Joash Negalegn....welcome home. You will never know how very much we love you!

Taking a Stand

I have been watching (with much curiosity and HUGE admiration) the news today about the young Iranian pastor who is on trial for his faith. Yes, his faith. Not because he ran a plane into two towers and incinerated human beings, but because he dared to declare his faith in Christ publicly and refused to renounce his Savior. I remember years ago my pastor asking each of us if we would renounce Christ if we were threatened with death. I couldn't answer that question then....I still can't. I think I would, I hope I would, I know I should but would I? None of us can truly answer that unless we are faced with it.
This Sunday we will look on as four of our dear people at Bay Life will be baptized. It will be in a public forum at the beach here in Montego Bay. They will be making a public declaration that they have put off the old and have taken on the new. They are identifying with Christ in front of not only our church congregation, but also in front of lots of onlookers at the beach. The scripture teaches that each of us who claim His name should be willing to unashamedly claim Him in front of the world. That is what each one of our dear converts are doing. As they go in the water they will be signifying Christ's death, burial, and resurrection. What a public step for each of them.
How about you? Maybe God will never call you to be a martyr for His name, but as a believer you have surely been called to be obedient to this small step in showing the world that you are one of His. Are you convicted that unlike this Pastor who is willing to give the ULTIMATE sacrifice for Christ, you have been unwilling to follow in this one small step? "But whoseover shall confess me before men, him will I confess also before my Father which is in heaven. But whosoever shall deny me before men, him will I also deny before my Father which in heaven." Matthew 10:32-33
I pray that when God calls on me to take my stand, I will do it regardless of the consequences....even giving my own life.
This has been the rambling of one tired Jamerican....SELAH!

Learning to wait and to listen....

For those who know me, you would without a doubt classify me as an impatient person. Patience has never been my virtue for sure. I'm not sure why I am so impatient as I was raised in the very lay back Caribbean culture. It would seem that I should be laid back. I wish! My lack of patience is one thing I really would like to change. Especially when I am impatient with myself...yep you heard right. I have grown impatient with ME!
Two years ago I noticed a funky looking rash on my arm and just thought I had brushed up against some weird plant. Or maybe I had been bitten by a freaky Jamaican bug. I really wasn't sure. It really didn't itch at first. Then it started spreading up my arm, kind of itching, and oozing. I also began what was to be a six week splitting migraine headache and nausea. After many attempts to get help here in Jamaica, I was finally forced to fly home to receive medical help. It wasn't until four weeks later that the headache finally subsided, the rash cleared up, and I was able to eat again. Doctors are not in agreement as to what my diagnosis was. One says it was viral meningitis and one says it wasn't but he doesn't know what it was. Whatever it was (I think it was a tropical born parasite called Rat Lungworm), it was the beginning of lots of health issues for me...thus the impatience with myself.

Fast forward to now. For the last year I have been seeing a neurologist that specializes in Multiple Sclerosis. That is a disease in which your immune system attacks your central nervous system. I have the tell tale two lesions on the brain, the demyelinating of the eyes, the numbness, tingling, and pain on my left side. I am still undiagnosed. It looks like MS but I have three of the four markers needed to qualify as MS. I don't really know what I have but I know my body is a mess. I so want to be out going door to door, doing open air meetings, and playing games in AWANA. My mind says go and my body says no. I am perturbed with myself and impatient with what is happening to me.

When you can't get up and go like you want, you learn to wait and listen. Wait on the Lord, and listen to what He has for you. I ponder things a lot more now since I have slowed down some. I listen a little better to those who hurt. I kinda feel their pain. I am learning to be more graceful and more patient with others. (except for maybe with the crazy drivers here). Life is just too short to be constantly uptight and running all the time. I am trying to be still and know that HE is GOD. I pray that while I am "broken", God can use my brokenness. I heard recently a quote that I absolutely love. "Broken vessels spill more water". Simple but so beautiful. I can be "Broken" and still spill more of the living water that our Jamaicans so need to partake of. Pray for me, pray for me to think clearly, see clearly, speak clearly, and move forward when God wants me to. Right now, I am just learning to wait and listen.....and working on that impatience!

This has been a rambling of one tired Jamerican...SELAH~

THE PIC AT THE TOP IS OF MY ARM WHEN THE DISEASE FIRST STARTED. PTL, ALL I HAVE TO SHOW FOR IT NOW IS A FAINT SCAR TO PROVE GOD'S FAITHFULNESS!

Mi tired mun...

I knew when we returned from the USA two weeks ago that we were coming back to the hottest time of the year for Jamaica. I have almost chuckled out loud as I read on facebook all the crying about the 100+ temps occurring over portions of the United States. However, for those of you up there just remember how blessed you are to have air conditioned homes and workplaces to enjoy. Not so down here. In the midst of all of this extreme heat, our first summer mission group arrived from LaGrange, NC. Not only did they come in the hottest time of the year, but they came to work in the toughest VBS group we currently have and in some of the roughest conditions. Did they let either of these factors intimidate or discourage them? No mun...not at all.

They arrived here last Friday with smiles on their faces and an arsenal full of goodies and fun for the children of Deeside. They went and ministered in the church at Deeside (Harvest Baptist) without either of us with them as well since we are fully engaged in ministry at Bay Life Baptist. Even this didn't really seem to bother them. After a three hour service (and test of endurance in the heat) they were still pumped and ready to start VBS on Sunday night after only two hours break in the afternoon. There was no grumbling, complaining, or even a whine heard from any of them.

VBS started out with a bang. The Pastor went out twice with his 12 passenger Hiace van and brought in over 50 kids in two loads. (We know how to pack them in down here) After registering over 150 kids, we literally stopped counting because they just kept trickling in all night. They came in ages ranging from little babies all the way to senior adults. This was repeated again on Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. Sunday and Monday we held VBS in the evening...much cooler but a whole lot more leg chomping mosquitoes. Tuesday and Wednesday were held in the blistering hot morning because the facility at Deeside has no lights except for some strung from the neighbor’s house to the main room. There are no lights in the back rooms at all. Since we needed every available ounce of space the decision was made to move it to the morning. CAN YOU SAY HOT??? The group just handled it all with grace.

Our last day of VBS on Wednesday morning was one of mixed emotions. The kids that the group had loved on all week would soon no longer be a part of their everyday routine. The relationships that had been started and nurtured would soon become just a stirring memory. I watched with a full heart as tearful goodbyes were said. Tempering the sadness was the sheer joy of knowing that many of those children had given their lives to Christ during the 1/2 week of VBS. We won't even know this side of Heaven the difference that was made in the lives of the children....or the group from NC for that matter.

It is always a blessing to us to be a small part of what God is doing to not only change the lives of our Jamaican people, but also to change the lives of visiting mission groups. Part of the goal of having mission teams is to allow God to change them...to see how God melts their hearts with a burden for the rest of the world. This week was no exception. Our tearful testimony sessions each day was a clear indicator that God was at work this week. Are we tired??? Yes mun...mi tired. Mi also full of joy....for God has done GREAT things.

This has been another rambling of one very tired Jamerican...SELAH!

Public profession

We had our first baptismal service at Bay Life last Sunday. For a baby church, this is kinda like cutting your first tooth, or taking your first steps. We had been looking forward to it with great anticipation....and we really prayed for no rain! Now I know for most USA churches, rain might mean a drop in attendance. In Jamaica, it means almost nobody shows up because they say that the rain makes them sick. (We haven't quite figured out how taking a shower every day doesn't also make them sick) But beyond that, we have our baptisms outside. Yep, the old fashioned way. So it really WAS important for the rain to stay away. The day arrived and the Jamaica sky was as blue as its' beautiful ocean waters. After we said the benediction we all "squoze" in to several members vehicles and headed for "dump up" beach. No, I'm not kidding, it really is called "dump up". Fortunately the name comes from the loads and loads of sand that were dumped there when the bay was reconfigured a few years ago. Somehow the name dump up just conjures up lots of nasty trash. In Jamaica, that too is all too common as well. Anyway, we all arrived at the bay and congregated around the seaside singing songs as our two Pastors (Cletis and Andrew) entered the water. One by one our precious people were baptized, six of them in all. Most have come to know Christ since Bay Life started back in October of last year. There are no words to describe the emotions I felt as I watched the new believers enter the waters of baptism. It was the culmination of lots of planning, praying, sowing the seed, and reaping God's harvest. During the service there were other people swimming at the beach that stopped their play to watch the baptismal service. Some even sang along with us as we sang songs of rejoicing. At the conclusion, one lady approached Andrew to inquire of him what church we were and where our church is located. It dawned on me....isn't that really what baptism is about? Isn't it supposed to be a public display of our decision to follow Christ? How public is it when we confine it within the walls of our church? Maybe I am just partial since this is the way I grew up seeing baptisms done...in the ocean in front of all to see as they pass by, sail by, or swim by. Maybe that is part of our problem these days as Christians....all of our christianity is confined to the four walls of our church. I hope that isn't the case. I pray that we are willing to walk out of our buildings and walk into a world that needs Christ and LIVE like it is our last chance to tell the good news of the gospel of Jesus Christ. It was a blessed day indeed for Bay Life Baptist...it was precious...and it was public. This has been another rambling of one tired Jamerican...SELAH!

Multiplying ourselves...

The church in America (at least the Baptist Church) is well known for their addition by division. In other words, many of our churches in the USA grow, or add, at the expense of the church down the road dividing. It's something that always bothered us when we were in stateside ministry. Because most people in Jamaica don't drive, you see very little of that. They pretty much stay with the church that is within walking distance of their house. However, this blog is not about adding by dividing....it's all about multiplying!
If you follow us at all, you know that we have a lot of groups that come down each year to help us in ministry. Those groups range from children traveling with their parents, all the way to senior citizens who still feel they have something left to give God in ministry. Although it can make for a lot of work for us, we LOVE having mission teams come down and spend a week or two ministering with us. We are amazed however that some missionaries do not enjoy them at all. We have heard comments like, "Sure wish they would just send us all the money they spent on their trip...I could use it a lot more." Our jaws drop when we hear such comments. Could we use the money...ABSOLUTELY. Would we prefer the money over the physical ministry...NO WAY! This is where our prayer for multiplication comes in. Fact is, both of us are past the half century mark now. We know that we will not be able to minister forever in Jamaica. Our physical ( and maybe mental :)) limitations will at some point hinder us from serving in this capacity. Every time another person comes to our island and ministers to our people, we pray that they will catch the burden for Jamaica. We often warn them that though they must physically leave Jamaica, they will never get Jamaica out of their hearts. Many of them can attest to that being true. We pray over every group that God will call young people and adults to come down here and help us shoulder the load and give out the good news of Jesus Christ. So for us, we are praying to multiply ourselves. From the two of us could come many missionaries in the days ahead. Doesn't that sound like a great plan.....trading two aging people for several young people? Will you pray with us to that end?

In closing, let me say this: Missions trips don't cost...they pay. The benefits you will reap in the lives on the trip will far outweigh the cost and hardships of getting down here. We would love to have you. Help us multiply God's workers in the harvest field of Jamaica and around the world. You will NEVER regret it.

This has been the rambling of one tired Jamerican....SELAH~

I am a "technoramus"!

I know, I know, Mr. Webster is probably rolling over in his grave right now, but I had to concoct a new word to describe my pitiful state of being right now. Who knows, this could actually be added to the old guys big book of words along with "ginourmous". Here is the definition according to Tammy: A technoramus is an aging missionary lady who sits at her computer often with complete ignorance as to how to do anything except turn it on, yet she ventures in with fear and trembling and often turns it off in despair". (Wow, I am out of breath after that crazy run-on sentence) Yes, I am the epitome of a "technoramus". (sigh)
Come along and experience with me a day in the life of a "technoramus":

First I gather on my work surface (usually my bed since it is the only half way cool room in the house) three different computers. On one computer are the majority of my pictures that I need to do my powerpoint backgrounds for Sunday worship. This computer is a mini Dell and I love it but 1) it absolutely refuses to hook up to the printer 2) it has a lovely red line down the right side of the screen due to some random hardware issue 3) It does not have Microsoft Powerpoint on it because my free trial ran out on it and I can't pay $100+ to purchase it. The second computer is a full size Acer computer that one of our churches gifted us with after our Dell was stolen when we were robbed last March. It has lots of my powerpoint background pics on it but 1) It is slower than the seven year itch 2) It no longer has a port to hook to the printer or flash drive because the stupid thing fell out a couple of months ago 3) I now fight with it every Sunday because it shoots me messages about "getting low on memory" (but remember I can't copy anything off of it because it doesn't have a port for a flash drive) 4) It is the ONLY one of the computers that has the Microsoft Powerpoint program on it. Then there is the third computer on the bed with me. It is a mini Acer Aspire just recently given to us by another one of our supporting churches but 1) The cursor skips all over the place while I try to type on it 2) Our printer only communicates with it on days when we don't really need it to and rarely on Sundays 3) It does not have most of my powerpoint pics on it 4) It does NOT have the Microsoft Powerpoint program on it. So.....here is how it goes for Tammy the "technoramus" every week: I find the pics I need on said mini Dell and e-mail them to myself. Then I move to the port-less big Acer, pull up my e-mail account and copy the pics to my picture folder or desktop. I create the powerpoints for Sunday worship on this one because it has the powerpoint program on it. Then I highlight and copy the words to all the songs I just made powerpoints for, go to my e-mail account again, and paste the words in a document to send to myself. Then I go to the mini Acer, pull up my e-mail account, highlight and copy the words to the songs onto a Wordpad document and then print them off...that is if the printer chooses to recognize the computer on that day. (Yes, after this I am tired) So, what would take a technogeek about ten minutes to do, takes this "technoramus" several hours to do. Get the picture?
What is the cure? I kinda think my sons would tell you there is NO cure for this particular "technoramus" cuz perhaps you just can't teach an old dog new tricks. There may be no cure for any of us who come from the "snail mail" generation for that matter. Maybe we just need to start all over again with one computer that has everything we need on it....except of course the one big feature it won't have. A genius to work it. :)
This has been another rambling of one tired Jamerican....SELAH!

Keeping one foot in eternity...

"Keep one foot in eternity" I read these words in a book recently and have spent the last two months wondering what it really means to me. In all honesty I can't think of a single statement I have read that has ever caused me more deliberations of the mind. It's like a catchy song that once heard just keeps playing over and over in your mind...really whether you want it to or not. This rambling blog is where I am drawing some of my conclusions on "keeping one foot in eternity".


I have given much thought to people -EXAMPLES - of some who I feel (beyond a shadow of a doubt) kept one foot in eternity. I could not begin to exhaust the great examples that are out there, but here are just two:

" No retreat, No reserve, No regrets"

"William Borden (pictured above), heir to the Borden family fortune, graduated from high school in 1904 and was given a trip around the world as a gift from his parents. His travels developed in him a burden for all the world's hurting people. He wrote a letter home about his desire for missionary work. His expressed desire was met with feelings of disbelief from one of his friends that he would "throw himself away as a missionary". Not to be stopped, William spent his college years at Yale not only studying, but developing Bible study groups, and creating mentoring programs for those found to be less than easy to work with on campus. He always claimed the biggest rascals for himself to mentor. He also started the Yale Outreach Mission and could often be found in the heart of the city at night ministering to and feeding those whose lives were wrecked by sin and hopelessness. His personal journal at college said this: "Say 'no' to self and say 'yes' to Jesus every time".
Upon graduation, Borden announced his call to the Muslim Kansu people of China and he never wavered from that. Although he was a millionaire he realized that his life was to be about His Father's business. On his way to India he stopped in Egypt to study Arabic in order to effectively minister to the Muslim Kantou in India. There he contracted spinal meningitis and within a month, 25 year old William Borden was dead. Written in the leaf of his bible were these words: "No retreat, No reserve, No regret". You see, William Borden had always, I believe, kept one foot in eternity.

Of ganja and the Gospel....

We just wrapped up a very busy week of ministry here in Jamaica. It was our privilege to host a team from the Gospel Baptist Church in Greensboro. This is a team we have been anxiously anticipating all year since they first came down and did a survey trip with us in January. Although not originally one of our supporting churches, our hearts have been knit with them in a true burden for Jamaica.

It all started for them several years ago (before we ever arrived here) when they did a mission venture here with a nondenominational ministry group. They started (right out of the gate!) working with the area of Canterbury......what the locals perceive as "the least, the last, and the lost". We know that is not how we or our Lord perceives them. Through work projects and ministry teams, God placed in them an unquenchable desire to make a difference in this somewhat forgotten community.

The work of the Lord in Canterbury, and all over our island, began this trip long before they ever arrived at the airport. They had lots of fundraisers, meetings, and organizational sessions. Lots of time was put into preparing their hearts before their feet were ever engaged. One of the great things they did was by giving each member a copy of the book "Reckless Faith" (a must read) and also a prayer journal to follow while here. With that kind of preparation, their hearts were well prepared for their journey.

Our arrival in Canterbury was quite warm. Since this group has had an ongoing relationship with the Canterburians, there was no sign of animosity or distrust. (The Montegonians will tell you not to enter Canterbury....that the danger and animosity is too risky) Old faces (that I personally only met in January) were there to greet us with open arms. Although the strong smell of ganja (marijuana) and Red Stripe (our local beer) were overwhelming at times, the love extended to us was unbelievable. It makes me think of Christ...who lovingly met everyone at their point of need. It is not for us to clean them up....it is up to the Holy Spirit. It is only for us to LOVE them.

Every day started with a soft touch. Painting nails, playing ball, and engaging in conversation. I had the privilege to sit and talk with "bald head" (or maybe it was "ball-head?) who never wears a shirt and is covered (and I'm not exaggerating) with scars from gunshots and stab wounds. He seems to be somewhat of a leader in this troubled area, though he swears to me that he is not in a gang. We talk about gunshots, stabbings, close encounters with death....and Christ. Like so many, he acknowledges his need but feels God really can't love him. It is quite difficult to convey a loving, caring God to a people who are so destitute and don't feel so loved by Him. It is one little seed though....planted in hard soil for sure. Only God can make the increase for him. My other precious encounter is with "Bepop" (or maybe "Bebop"?) who is a quite elderly resident that lives in complete squalor at the front of the community. While Kelly Miller goes into sweep, mop, and sanitize his humble residence, I sit on his porch and we sing together. He just keeps singing Jamaican gospel choruses, one right after the other. I have the privilege to sit and sing along...and harmonize with one of the sweetest sounds I have ever heard. He is blind so he can't see me, but in between songs he asks lots of questions about me. Who knows what his image of me is in his head. I hope it is the image of a simple girl who loves him unconditionally and I pray he sees God in me. Somewhere along the line Bepop got a good dose of the gospel and I pray His name is written down in Heaven......cuz I sure would love to sing around the throne with him someday.

Lesson time is a challenge. Pastor Luttrell starts out with gospel magic. Since Jamaicans are somewhat superstitious, they are in awe of these simple lessons in magic. The young (tough) guys all sit at a table off to the side. This 16-30 age is where we are losing ground in Jamaica. I watch them closely....and they are REALLY paying attention. The entire time Pastor and Mrs. Luttrell are teaching there are people, goats, dogs, and babies just running all over the place. God still moves! Precious little souls raise their hands for salvation....and big tough guys motion for Pastor to come over to their table. They want to know how he does his tricks! He begins to show them and now they want to try. As he hands them the objects, they open their hands to receive.....and they have to drop the ganja (marijuana) they have been holding on to so tightly. What a picture of what Christ does. He takes all those worldly things we grasp so vigorously and He fills that void with HIMSELF! After Pastor Paul has answered questions, our sweet Andrew gives his testimony of God rescuing him from the ravages of alcohol and brokenness. He then spends the next few minutes answering their questions from the Bible. They listen intently...he is after all a Jamaican and has walked where they now walk. I am once again reminded of why we are here.....to fill these young Pastors with the word and train them to reach their own people. Some of them accept Christ that day. More seed dropped into all kinds of soil.

The last effort in Canterbury was to give food and clothing....to put the gospel in shoe leather. We can say it all we want...but until they see Christ's love in action all our words are in vain. There was a virtual stampede for the goodies.....desperate people do desperate things. Though I can't say it went down the way we had planned, God knew it all along. Food was delivered, feet that were bare now have shoes, and we were all blessed to be a part of it!

My heart is full looking back on our time there. Not a day goes by that I don't think of those precious people there and thank God for Gospel Baptist Church and their love for the downtrodden. They left a part of themselves here, but most of all they left the message of Christ. So, what do you think? I think it was an awesome trade off.......the shackles of ganja for the salvation of the gospel! That's what missions is all about.

This has been the ramblings of one tired Jamerican.....SELAH!

Shout to the Lord....

SHOUT TO THE LORD, ALL THE EARTH LET US SING; POWER AND MAJESTY, PRAISE TO THE KING!! These are the words we heard resounding from our congregation of 91 at our launch service for Bay Life Baptist Church of Bogue Village, Montego Bay. Apart from the laughter of my grandchildren, it might possibly be the sweetest sound I have ever heard. After years of planning, months of canvassing, and hours of prayer, our new baby church was born. In our congregation of 91 were 13 children, 62 adults from our community, and 16 Americans from our team in North Carolina. We were both packed out in our little room and simultaneously overwhelmed with God's incredible goodness to us.

For those who don't know, Bay Life Baptist Church was conceived in our hearts back in 2007 when we first felt God calling us into full time missions. Little did we know then, but God had already burdened Harvest Baptist Church of Burlington, NC several years earlier with the need to plant a church in the greater Montego Bay area. They had been working with a Jamaican national for quite some time who had committed to come alongside and plant this church. When he switched gears and took an existing church in Kingston, we were there to work with them. Fourteen of their membership arrived here last Tuesday to help us do one last blitz in the Bogue Village community before having our launch service yesterday. As a result of their work in canvassing and the blood pressure clinic done on Saturday, eight souls were won to Christ before our launch service yesterday. God is so good!

In typical fashion, when 10:00 starting time rolled around yesterday morning, we only had a handful of people at church. As we began the service with the singspiration of Jamaican choruses there was a steady stream of people filing in. By the time our praise and worship portion was over the place was packed! We had to move all of our visiting team and some of our core group team out into the hallway. When we dismissed children for childrens church, thirteen children followed our workers out. As Cletis preached from John chapter one "Turn on the Light" there was full attention and even interaction from the congregation. The invitation was given and a stream of people filed out into the hall to be counselled by our leadership. A final tally showed six decisions for salvation and an equal amount for rededication. One mommy was even born again in childrens church as she listened to our leadership give the gospel to the children in very simple terms. As you can imagine, our hearts are overflowing.

Continue to pray for our core group of leaders who have embarked on this adventure with us. Pray for God to protect them from the evil one and keep them strong in their christian walk. Pray for our community, Bogue Village. It is a middle class community with large numbers of single mommies and couples who live together but are not married. Some of them came to Christ yesterday. Pray that the Holy Spirit will mature them and they will be obedient to following what Christ has now called them to do. There will be a series of messages given on the gospel of John and then Romans. Sound doctrine is so necessary here. Pray that God will sustain us in this mission...this is definitely a stretch for us.

For future needs....we are going to need a building and maybe sooner than we think. Our little room is already packed. There is a parcel of land for sale right beside the unit we now rent. We are praying for God to give us that land. Please make this a matter of fervent prayer. We are seeing Him do great things here....and we know that nothing is impossible with God.

Thank you for holding our arms up. We feel it every day. The challenges here are many and sometimes completely overwhelming. We know we can count on you to pray.

This has been a very excited rambling from one very tired Jamerican.....SELAH!

I'm a little scared.....

My husband and I began a journey three years ago that ultimately landed us in a country not of our birth, with a house not our own, and completely and utterly "family-less".( All our kids are grown and we left them all behind) When we started out, it seemed kinda like a piece of cake. Aside from traveling all the time and ministering in churches across the eastern United States, life was basically normal. But....once we disembarked that airplane on August 20, 2009, life was forever changed. For two sort of aging adults, it has been a wild ride....and yes, I am scared.
One of the first fears I had to learn to face was safety. Coming from Greensboro, NC (where we in fact seldom ever even locked our doors) to Montego Bay, Jamaica (where we are completely enclosed behind locked bars) was indeed a shock to the system. What is forever etched in my mind is what our dear Jamaican friend Hazel Dalley said to us before we moved here. She cried and she actually begged and pleaded with us not to come. She said "You will be killed...doon move here; only just come in and out like ya brudda Dusty....doon move here." We were humbled by her concern but completely oblivious to the truth of her statement. After living here you realize that you must always be aware of the inherent dangers. As my doctor here also told me...."it is indeed very easy to die in Jamaica; please be careful". Just driving here puts your life in danger. If you have ever been here, you know what I am talking about. There is little respect for human life...and every day I am here I realize it more. Crime is rampant and hearing gunshots has become our new normal. Robbery is commonplace, and we have already fallen victim to it. And yes...I am scared.

The second thing I am scared about is my health. It seems like the girl who got off that airplane 13 months may never be quite the same. After battling whatever the disease was last December, my body is struggling to recover. Some days I don't much notice the difference and other days I feel it in every step. I just keep talking to my Father and telling him about it and asking for his grace and then I talk to myself about pressing on. That's what we do as God followers....we press on in this race til we reach that ultimate finish line. But yes, I am scared.

My third fear is just a mom thing. I am scared of being separated from my children and grandchildren. After all, what are moms and Nena's for if not to be there to patch things all up again? I never realized how hard it would be to be an ocean away from our children and grandchildren. It's funny how just a hug from your son or daughter, or snuggles from your grandkids can make any day seem alright. It is equally amazing how a day can feel so wrong when you don't have that privilege. (Some days I even fret that my grandbabies won't really know me) We are a close family and this year has stretched us all in our faith and in our trust in God to take care of each other across the miles. Does that make sense....because I feel it in a very real way.

My biggest fear is failure. The task for us here is monumental. We are following God's leading here to plant a church in Montego Bay. Truth is, we have never planted a church before. We are both children of church planters, but now WE are the ones doing the planting. Down here that involves a lot of learning the culture, tilling the soil, and work, work, work. One big difference here is that you can't leave anything in the church after service. Although our meeting room is gated and barred we have to keep everything here in our home, load it up every Sunday morning, unload it and set it up before church, tear it all down after service, load it back in the work van, and unload it back into our house. If we leave it there, it will be stolen. This is a foreign concept for most of us in the USA as we just lock and unlock the buildings and turn everything on. It requires an enormous amount of work here. We are also constantly trying to strike a balance between cultures. We don't want to start an American church here but we also see the rut that so many of our struggling churches here are in. It is a tough task. Immorality is huge here. We have an 85% illegitimate birth rate...and it appears to be quite accepted. Developing a strong male leadership base is one of the most difficult things to do in our culture in Jamaica. As a result, women have taken roles that scripture defines as for a man. Do you see the enormity of the task? And yes, I am scared of failure.
These days I say aloud scripture about being strong and courageous. (Isn't it funny how all the little Cubbie and Sparkie verses rush in when you really need them?) In my head I know that God will never leave me nor forsake me, or leave me high and dry...but sometimes I have to remind my fearful heart of that. When sheer loneliness sets in, I CRY out to Jesus. In those moments where there is sheer joy in our ministry, I SING out to Jesus. When those little fears come creeping in, I am learning to rest in Jesus. After all, God is bigger than the "boogey man", the rasta man, and the FEAR of man.
This is just another rambling of one very tired (and sometimes scared) Jamerican......SELAH!!

Baby, Baby!!

Oh baby, baby. Words that are music to a "Nena's" ears. Aside from having my own children many years ago, I can't think of anything I find more exciting than welcoming a new little grandchild into the world.

On July 3oth we were blessed to welcome Macey Cooper Allen into our family. She is the daughter of our oldest daughter Stefanie and her husband Mike. She is also the little sister of Parker Titus Allen who is now six years old. She is, of course, completely gorgeous and the spitting image of her mommy. So tiny, so perfect, and so precious. Ahhh.....I get all excited just talking about her!

I have been blessed to be able to stay in the states for this month to help Stef with the baby. (Ain't that what mommies are for??) Because Stef has been very sick with an infection, I have actually had the opportunity to spend alot of quality time with Macey and even pull my fair share of the third shift. My favorite thing to do in the wee hours of the night is to lay her down beside me and just lay there and stare at her while she sleeps. Of course....there's a whole lotta kissin' goin' on too!

I am realizing all over again how needy and helpless a newborn child is. They are absolutely dependent on us for everything....they can't even wipe their own dribble chin for heaven's sake. If left unattended, they will absolutely lay right in one place and never move unless someone comes along to help them. If we don't feed them, they will absolutely starve. They've no capacity to fend for themselves. If we don't change their diapers they are doomed to lay in their own squalor with no hope of a clean up taking place. They are the best definition I know of total dependence.

My husband and I have now been blessed to have two new births into the Titus family in 2010. Our grandson Caleb Titus was born in May and now Macey just three weeks ago.....but we are not done yet!! We are about to witness the birth of our first Jamaican child. Her name is Bay Life Baptist Church and her due date is October 3, 2010. She will be born in the Bogue Village (pictured at the top of this page) in Montego Bay and her birth will be attended by several Jamaican families and two American missionary families who are already absolutely in love with her. She has been in the works for several years in our hearts and we have spent the last year planning for her, telling everyone we know about her, and getting her room ready. There are no words to describe just how excited (and somewhat anxious) we are as we anticipate her arrival. We are praying that God will go before us in this birth process just as He has for our grandchildren .We are bracing ourselves for the initial newborn "total dependence" phase. We know there will be sleepless nights, added financial responsibility, lots of spiritual food to prepare, and yes....plenty of "diapers to change". BUT, WITH GOD'S HELP.....WE ARE UP TO THE TASK!

We have a birth announcement all prepared and would love to send it out to anyone who sends us their e-mail address. We even listed some of the new items we will need to meet the needs of this new addition in our lives and we are sure God will provide for all of them through His people. He has never let us down yet!

Please pray for the upcoming special event and for all the families who are anticipating being a part of this special day. And ALWAYS, ALWAYS....remember your missionaries in Jamaica. You know, Cletis and Tammy Titus....those 2 Tired Jamericans! This has been the rambling of one of those tired Jamericans....SELAH!!

All things new.....

It is spring in North Carolina. The grass is as green as I have ever seen it....perhaps that is because I rarely see pretty green grass anymore. Everything is in bloom..and my itchy eyes alert me to that each day. There are budding flowers and signs of new life everywhere. New Life....nothing better. I arrived back in North Carolina on Mothers Day and just in time for the birth of our third grandchild, Caleb Joshua Titus. He is 6 lbs 11 oz of pure preciousness-sent straight from Heaven. (Think I'm kiddin'? Check out the attached picture!) He is also the spitting image of his daddy, our oldest son Randy. He is of course beautiful....and a reminder of all things new. A brand new little human miracle from God. The day he was born we also realized that there were four more new additions born on the Titus property. As Hailey (Caleb's big sister) and I were swinging on the front porch swing that evening, we noticed four little baby birds had hatched in their nest in the bush beside the front porch. We snuck over and peeked in to see four little featherless chicks just chirping away for their mommy to return with their meal for the day. (I captured the moment in an awesome picture) It was a teachable moment as Hailey and I talked about what a great God we have, the God that not only gave us Caleb out of mommy's tummy that morning, but also the God that gave us new life in the four little baby birds all snuggled up in their nest. Each day since then we always stop to sneak a peek at the growing baby birds and marvel at our great God's creation. Something so simple, yet so profound. A creator that gives us little baby Titus'es is the same creator that gives us little baby birds....and He loves and cares for us all.

This is just another rambling of one tired Jamerican.....SELAH

Drat those expectations....

One of the biggest, weightiest words I know of is the word expectation. It means something different to every individual. My expectations are not your expectations. The trouble with that word is another really hefty word called REALITY. Joyful is the occasion when your expectation and your reality are one and the same.
I came to Jamaica with huge expectations. Maybe the worst thing for me was that I thought my expectations were based on my realities. For starters, I grew up in the Caribbean. I was a glad participant in it's culture for the first thirteen years of my life. I really thought I had a grasp on what it was like to live in the Caribbean.When you are an MK growing up on a tropical island, every day is an adventure. Second, I had been to Jamaica many times on short term missions ventures, years ago, and really thought that the Jamaica I remembered from the late '80's was still the Jamaica of 2009. The Jamaicans were oh so gracious to us when we here back in those days. The children were eager to hear the Word of God, and you could roam the streets after dark with nary a worry. Third, I knew that I would be living in another country, separated from my kids and grandkids, but after all, it really isn't that far away. I could be home in three hours by airplane. It didn't take very long for my realities to slap my expectations right up side the head. I very quickly learned that some Jamaicans truly love you, another segment is completely indifferent to you, and the rest of them flat out hate you and what you stand for. I can't stand in the Red Cross line barefoot with my sister anymore waiting for bags of dried milk to devour. Nor can I play my life away at the beach. You see, the things my parents did while I was busy being a carefree little girl, I am now doing. It ain't always fun. Just driving to the grocery store here can be an adventure. I have sort of decided I probably shouldn't drive anywhere that I can't safely walk back home from. Between mechanical issues and vehicle theft.....I maybe using those two feet of mine to hoof it back home. And about those kids we used to come minister to back in the '80's. They've all grown up now and somewhere along the way they lost their ability to teach their own children respect and good polite behavior. (sounds alot like the USA, huh?) Now it takes a group of us just to keep the peace long enough to teach a Bible story all the way through without a major interruption. So very sad. And lest I be so hard on the kids, they learn from example. When the parents blatantly disregard traffic laws and disrespect authority, haven't we then set our children up for disaster? Just sayin'. And about the distance thing. The reality is that there is no substitute for the peace of mind of knowing I could just get in the car and drive to where my kids are a few miles away. None of them are really all that close and I miss them more and more each day. The heart just aches sometimes.
So what do I do with all these unreal expectations? For me it has involved a daily laying of them at the Lord's feet. There are days I really feel His peace and others that I spend all day searching for it. The older I get the more I need His peace. What about these stark realities? I just keep reminding myself that it was a real mom who bore a real Jesus who died on a real tree and died a real death. He even KNEW his reality ahead of time and asked if it would be possible to pass on it and do it some other way. I think I ask that question quite often frankly. So....Drat those expectations and a big bah humbug to realities.
These are the most sincere and honest ramblings of a very tired Jamerican.....SELAH.

Tiefs and Taxes

Couldn't resist this one. We have actually been robbed twice in one month! Most of you know by now that on Saturday March 20th, around three a.m., we were robbed. Though we live in a house that is encased in locked bars (Jamaicans call it a "grilled" house), a burglar slipped through a six inch opening on our front porch while we slept, and made off with about $750 worth of our stuff. This included my purse, my husband's phone, our camera, and my laptop computer. Fortunately, we were in our room and there was no altercation involved. Another blessing was that we had Cletis'es school computer in the bedroom with us, or it would have been gone too. We awoke on Saturday morning to find the window open and all of our belongings that could fit through that small six inch gap gone. It was a sinking feeling to say the least. Robbery is common in Jamaica so it was not a complete shock to us that it happened. Though these things are missed, they are just that....THINGS. You would think that to be enough, right? Believe it or not, we were robbed again today on April 8th while sitting in our daughter and son-in-laws home in Orlando, Florida. This time we lost over $2,000 of cold, hard earned cash! So much for the safety and security of the USA, huh?! To beat it all, it was a relative that took it from us. His name is UNCLE SAM! After much wrangling, crunching numbers, and profuse sweating, our federal taxes show we owe over $2000 because we have to declare all that outfit and passage money spent on vehicles we bought for our use in Jamaica as income. Our own uncle doesn't even care that we had a little over $15,000 of medical expenses this past year. I have never seen an uncle seem so calloused and cold towards our predicament. So, yes my friend. We have been robbed twice in one month. Once by a "tief" (Jamaicans don't put that "h" in there when they say thief) and once by our very own uncle. I don't know about you but I say it is time to say "ENOUGH" to this coldhearted man we call "UNCLE SAM". Old Sam I am, you are a vicious old man...with your way high tax, red ink in hand. We left it all for another land, you still come tiefing old Sam I am. We've had enough....we see your scam....we won't re-elect Old Sam I am!

This is just another rambling of one tired Jamerican.....SELAH!

What's in a happy meal?

I am an unashamed, over the top fan of happy meals. I don't really know what it is, but once they tuck that little cheeseburger into a cardboard box with handles and insert a cute little toy...I am suckered in! To me the fries are crispier, the burger cheesier, and the coke sweeter if it comes in a happy meal. The cool thing about it? My husband loves them too. No, he doesn't eat them but for him the price is right. In Jamaica it is about $375 for a Burger King kids meal. Yeh, I know that technically McDonalds is the true owner of the "happy meal" but since Jamaica boasts no McDonalds eateries, I close my eyes at Burger King and pretend I am eating a bonafide happy meal. Oh, and $375 here translates to about $4 US dollars. (I can hear some of you hyperventilating after reading the above price).
One of the funniest stories I recall of my mom's last days on Earth was when she realized for the first time that adults could order happy meals. She had always believed that you had to be a kid to order one or the Happy Meal Police might getcha. The day my sister bought her one for the first time you would've thought she had purchased her a diamond ring. (Well, not really. Betty Louise did love her some jewelry) There were many more happy meals to come for her before the Lord took her home. I also think of how much fun it is to take my grandkids for happy meals. Their mommies aren't too fond of it...but I kinda think when we go home to visit they just might let Nena take them out for a special date to McDonalds for a happy meal and playplace. That's the stuff Nena's and Poppa's are good for and can actually afford!
Recently I have learned of a good use for all those happy meal toys that we accumulate in the bottom of the toybox or in the floorboard of our car. Did you know that a little happy meal toy is actually a special treat to our Jamaican schoolkids? When we have the occasion to go in to our Public Schools here and minister, it is always a good idea to take along a good stash of happy meal toys....still in the plastic wrapper. Where at home your child may not think much of it, and in fact not even unwrap it, here it is looked at as an awesome gift. We teach a Bible lesson and then have a question and answer time afterwards. The prize for a right answer is....you guessed it...a happy meal toy. This is especially true for our rural area schools where they rarely make it down to the city to frequent a Burger King.
So....the next time you order a happy meal. Think about Jamaica and how you could make some little boy or girls day with that simple little plastic toy that came wrapped in your box. And...when you think about us down here...pray for us. We have a lot of teams coming down to minister with us this year. Some will be giving Bible stories to these little boys and girls in our schools. Pray for us in Jamaica that we will see a great harvest of souls of these little Happy Meal loving kids.
This is just another rambling of one tired Jamerican....SELAH!

Mi cyant dance.......

If you have ever been privileged to observe or be a part of a church service in the Caribbean, you will know exactly what I am talking about in this post. It is always amusing to us,( and HILARIOUS) to watch groups of lily white people who come here to visit try to dance like the Jamaicans when they sing. Our church services here in Jamaica always consist of a time of singing "lively songs". (That is actually what they call it!) During these lively songs everyone is clapping and moving from side to side and even the Pastors are doing a nice little "jig". I love it.....can't quite do it...but I love it. They "shuffle" ( I initially called it a sway and they quickly corrected me because sway has a sexual connotation here) from side to side and in perfect time and rhythm. We are in a different church with our students every weekend so I am always sitting in the pew with several of them during chorus time. I have tried and tried to get my white girl rhythm goin......it just ain't the same! They all laugh at me trying to "get my shuffle on" and just shake their head in disbelief. So now I stand between them and make them stand real close so they can "bump" me with their hips if I am out of sync. And...if you think I am bad, you should see my husband. He seriously can't even clap in sync! So, if you ever come to Jamaica...do yourself a favor in church.....please....just observe! This is just another rambling of one tired Jamerican......SELAH!

Our move into MoBay.......

For some it is difficult to picture what it is like to live in Jamaica. We have been here now six months and have already undergone some major changes. Our most recent change was moving into the city of MoBay after living up in a very rural mountain area for four months. So what is it like for us now?

I've posted three pics above to give you a better idea. We moved into the first floor of this three story house back in November. When we first came to look at it, it was filthy dirty and in need of some major work...therefore we got it at a fairly cheap monthly rent. We scrubbed grime out of grout, washed and scrubbed all cabinets and countertops and added light fixtures over bare lightbulbs. We are located in the Coral Gardens area, an upper middle class neighborhood to the east of the airport in Montego Bay. Above us on the second story is Dave and Mary Davison, missionaries with the Assemblies of God who have been here for over 20 years. Our Landlord, Brian, lives on the third story. Brian is Jamaican and drives a taxi. He also loves his liquor. Pictured above is his stash of beer bottles that he throws out at the wall when he comes in from driving his taxi all day. (that is fairly normal and accepted here unfortunately). He also has a fond affection for the security system on his taxi van so we get to hear it go off usually very early in the morning and very late at night. We will never need an alarm clock!

Our flat consists of two bedrooms and two bathrooms. We have "titusized" it to the best of our ability to make it feel like home. We have already been privileged to have guests here from the USA to occupy the spare bedroom and we have students here with us almost every weekend. In our housing subdivision (Jamaicans call them housing "schemes") lives at least four other missionary couples that we know of. It is always delightful to get together with them as often as possible.

We have asked God to help us use our home to be a ministry tool. We are looking forward to having some home Bible studies here, as well as hosting more friends and family from home. We feel our home is a valuable tool in our ministry and thank God for His provision.

So, though some think we are "suffering for Jesus", we prefer to think of it as "toiling for Jesus". Remember to pray for us down here doing God's work in Jamaica. These are just the ramblings of one tired Jamerican....SELAH!