Too Funny!

We went out with our daughter and son in law and Parker. After eating at the cafeteria, yes we are old, we decided to make a Target run. While there we played divide and conquer since all of us needed something. Parker had already had a particularly bad behavior night but was promised a slushee if he could pull it together and behave well at Target. Stef and I went our separate way from Mike and Parker and managed to check out first. We waited at the snack bar for Mike and Park and when they go to checkout Park ran over to us and asked his mom if he could have a slushee. Stef responded that she would go ask his dad about his behavior and then decide. As she walked away he said "Mom I was kind of a little bit a good boy". When she continued to walk on toward Mike he yelled out, "Okay Mom I wasn't a very good boy!" Yep, we all laughed. The little rascal fessed up. I love that little rascal.....and at least he came clean! Just the ramblings of one tired Jamerican...SELAH!

Godsmacked

Dontcha love it when you get "Godsmacked"? I woke up today with one of my nasty migraines and really struggled through the day. I decided to relay my calamity via facebook...I guess misery loves company?? My post evoked several sweet comments from friends who assured me of their love and prayers. One was from one of my very dear friends from high school/youth group days who just found out he has cancer. He assured me of his love and prayers too and reminded me to be encouraged that God was taking good care of me. He related that he felt bad for me because though he was dealing with cancer, at least he is in no pain. I WAS GODSMACKED! Sometimes we feel so hopeless and then God reminds us that we are not alone and that as bad as it may seem right now for us...there is always someone else who has it so much worse. Thanks Doyle for helping me to get my eyes off myself...I love you and I am praying for you. Just the ramblings of one tired Jamerican...SELAH!!

Be a Betty Louise...choose to forgive

I am sitting here with my Bible open trying to pour some good stuff into my soul this morning. I am one of those Bible carriers that has to be in the catchers mode when I open my Bible....it is filled with pictures and handwritten notes. When I opened it this morning.....out fell a black and white picture of my mom, decked in her "do rag" (and she wore it with style in those cancer days) and grinning from ear to ear. What a treasure! I just sat and stared at it and studied it for a few minutes (yep...before I ever read the first verse of scripture). What a picture of grace, beauty, and forgiveness. It just hit me. All the things I struggle with it seems she just personified. (She is with the Lord now). How is it that someone who was abandoned by her mom at a young age, mistreated by her stepmom for years, widowed in her forties, caretaker for said abandoned mom later in life....could be such a symbol of grace and forgiveness. I believe she CHOSE to forgive. It wasn't something that just naturally happened. I do believe by the way that my mom was somewhat superhuman (youdahadtaknownher) but I don't think this all just happened. I know she struggled with her lot in life and yes, she chose, to be graceful and forgiving. For some of us it is a true character flaw that we want to be loved and accepted by everyone. I possess this said flaw. I saw mom struggle with those who would malign her, thwart her attempts at love and acceptance, even plot evil against her. I was there in her dying days when she received a robust vase of roses from a lady who had done nothing but plot her destruction at their former church, only to now beg for her forgiveness as mom lay dying. She chose to forgive....as she had so many times in life. What a blessed example for me. These last days have been days of true heartsearching about the events of the last few weeks in my life as a missionary. I am in so many ways following the path of my mom. What will I do with the forgiveness Christ has given me. Will I chose to withhold it from those who "plot evil against me" or will I CHOOSE to be a Betty Louise and grant it freely? Just the ramblings of one tired Jamerican......Selah.

grandkids are God's reward to us for not killing our kids when they were teenagers

If you haven't experienced the joy of grandparenting yet, my heart goes out to you. There is no other experience in life to compare it to. It truly is God's gift to us for allowing our children to live when they were in those teen years and seemed to be throwing themselves headlong into their own self destruction at times. I am laying here recuperating in a murphy bed that pulls out of the wall in my grandson's (Parker) playroom at my daughter and son in laws home. On the walls are pictures of his handprints, zoo adventures, toothless grins, and fat baby cheeked photographs. I recall each one of these phases with vivid memories of lots of joy and laughter. It was as if the day he entered this world, May 23, 2004...this old lady was reborn into a child again. I had the privilege of keeping him in my home every day as my daughter worked and watching his first smiles, first teeth, first words, first steps, and even his first little acts of rebellion. I could recount in him the days of his moms childhood as well as see in him the promise of a young man who was shaping up to be much like the man we had come to know in his precious young father. There is no joy like it on earth. Then nearly four years later came sweet Hailey, our first granddaughter and the first child of our son Randy. I remember the fear that gripped me when her birth seemed to be nearing a difficult phase and the prayers that I pled with God to bring her to us safely and take good care of her sweet momma too. When she entered the world, a beautiful little porcelain package all decked out in her mom's good looks and healthy, I breathed a sigh of relief and whispered my prayer of thanks back to God for His brand new gift to us. She is sitting in the livingroom right now in her footie jammies watching little mermaid with her pretty blonde hair streaming down her back and her baby blue eyes lighting up the room. Yes, I am glad that we chose to let our children live through those tough years (when you sure do feel like taking them out sometimes) so that we can now reap the benefits of Parker and Hailey...and of course more coming along the way. Grandchildren truly are a crown on the gray hairs of this old woman that make me feel like the princess that God always intended for me to be!Just the ramblings of one tired Jamerican....Selah!

The long journey back to "normal"

For those of you who have been out of the Titus loop, this has been a very trying week for us. It was one week ago Thursday that my body broke out in a nasty rash, my head starting hurting like it would blow off my shoulders, and my neck felt as if it could not support the weight of the head on my shoulders. Soon came the unbelievable nausea and feverish bouts. Two trips to the local clinic yielded temporary pain relief but no answers. Having been a migraine sufferer for many years, I knew this was different but couldn't seem to get relief. My precious husband stayed by my side almost continually and helped me hold my head up and get bathed at least each day. However, by one week into it I actually got to the point where I lost the desire to live if this is what life had to offer me. As a believer I am ashamed that I would ever assume to think I could take my life in my own hands...it is not mine to take. Thanks to my husband and children it was decided to evacuate me home to get medical help here in the states. Thank God for High Point Regional Hospital ER staff. Upon arriving stateside Friday evening, I was immediately taken to the ER where there were abnormal cells present in my spinal tap. Viral meningitis has been wreaking havoc on me for these past days. I am thankful to my family for proactively getting me relief and these last two days have been so comfortable and reassuring. God's grace is sufficient.....even in our weakness. Just the ramblings on one tired Jamerican......Selah!